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8月31日 Staying Safe IITo lightly reiterate last week's entry, be aware of your surroundings, trust your instincts, walk with confidence, and go out in a group at night whenever possible. Preplan your parking arrangements if you will be leaving work (or anywhere else for that matter) at night: park in a well lit area, try to be as close to the door as possible, or at least within sight of the door. If there is a security guard in the building, you can ask that they either walk you to your car or at least watch until you are safely in your vehicle.
Form a plan in your mind as to what you would do if accosted. Here are a few things to think about:
Take your keys out of your purse before leaving the building. You can carry them in such a way that the key to your car door sticks out of your fist. It has sharp edges that can inflict pain and do some damage when raked across someone's face or any other part of their body.
If accosted, choose a tender portion of their person to attack. It is usually men who attack women, so remember that a well placed kick or knee to the groin is always good. Do it with all the force you can muster.
If you are grabbed from behind, slam the back of your head into their face. Flailing arms are not of much use, so try to hit them HARD in the head or face (preferably the face) with your purse or briefcase. Do it with all your strength.
Well placed fingers in their eyes can at least buy you some time.
If you stomp on the instep of their foot, you can also inflict a lot of pain. Use your heel, and stomp HARD.
Should you be grabbed from the front, remember to attack their face. When the hand is bent back, the heel of your hand can be used as a weapon. Bring your arm down and back, then bring the heel of your hand up under their nose. Drive the heel of your hand into their nose with all your might, coming up and pushing into their nose, attempting to drive it into the back of their head.
Remember that your elbow forms a point when you bring your hand to you. That point is quite strong and can also be used in place of a fist. Use it. 8月22日 Stay Safe!! Most women know to not walk around on city streets alone after dark, but what else can we do to discourage attack?
If you must leave work after dark, be sure that you park as close to the front door as possible. Keep your parked car locked and park under lighting if available. Some buildings have security guards. If you park close, they can either walk you to your car or at least watch to make sure you arrive safely.
Don't wait until you get to your car to look for your keys. Have them in your hand before you leave the building. They make a good weapon if you should need one. Look inside the car before you get in. Especially in the back seat.
Always be aware of your surroundings. If there is something or someone suspicious hanging around, use your instincts and your intuition. You may want to return to the building for a few minutes until you feel safe, and the circumstances change.
If you are single and go to the bars, go in a group. Don't allow yourself to become intoxicated. That's when we make very poor choices. If you have taken a friend or two with you as a safety net when meeting someone new, (which I highly recommend) don't dismiss them too quickly. Remember, even Ted Bundy 'seemed' like a nice guy!
Don't let fear rule your life, but stay safe, wherever you go. Attackers don't want someone who looks like they will put up a fight. They prey on those who look frightened or weak. So walk with purpose and confidence. Stand tall and walk like you are determined to reach you objective. I also highly recommend self defense classes to anyone . If nothing else, it will give you self confidence, and you want to use that to your advantage. 8月6日 Help is availableWhere does a person turn for help? If you have family, that is a good source of support. In my case, I wanted to be hidden and not put my family in jeopardy. At that time, there were no women's shelters or other assistance that I was aware of. Today, there is help in abundance. You simply have to go to the right agency to find help.
If you are a witness to child abuse, go to the police. Don't hesitate, it could cost a young life. If you are the victim of domestic violence, there is also help available. There is a wonderful organization named the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Their main page is: http://www.ncadv.org/aboutus.php They have a wealth of information and links to guide you to specific areas. You can find their statistics here: http://www.ncadv.org/resources/Statistics_170.html And this will give you the listing of their offices by state: http://www.ncadv.org/resources/StateCoalitionList_73.html Sex offenders are required by law to register their addresses. Curious as to who lives near you? You can find the listing for your state here: 8月3日 Families Domestic Violence is generally between adults in a family. However, quite often any children in the home also feel the effects, if not the actual physical abuse and pain.
When verbal abuse escalates into the physical battering that is so common, children, even very young children, are more aware than the adults realize. This sets the examples that the child will come to see as normal. This is especially true if the child sees the parents kiss and make up afterwards. It then can possibly become an expression of love in their minds. 'He/she hits me because he/she loves me.' I have heard and felt this rationale.
Some of the excuses I used to tell myself it was alright were:
I must have upset him somehow.
I should just keep my mouth shut and not make him angry.
I shouldn't be so demanding of his time.
If he didn't love me, he wouldn't care so much.
I shouldn't be so possessive.
He just had a bad day at work.
I should leave him alone when he is in a bad mood.
He was too drunk to know what he was doing.
These excuses are just that. Lame excuses. No one deserves to be battered, regardless of the reasons we may think the other person has.
A spouse is not the same as a parent, and does not have the right to physically punish the other person in the relationship. From the beginning of a relationship, communication is a key element to success.
Both parties should feel free to speak their minds without repercussions. This takes trust and the use of tact, which should be two things that both parties possess, promote and work toward in their union. |
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